SONNYRED'S LAST EUROPEAN POST

hello all,

hope you all had a good week. so this will be the last song i send out until i return and get resituated with Califly. i was walking along herengracht yesterday, listening to my ipod and i felt so dated, so prehistoric. here's another thing, i feel myself gravitating towards electro, electro indie, or whatever. i don't think i'm that gay yet, but i guess i do feel a little more "european."

... i'm starting to laugh at corny knock-knock jokes and i'm starting to gravitate towards women that find me and my persona absolutely repulsive (no, it IS different back home). this girl that i've been hanging out with called me a modern day charles bukowski, which was the first book i brought along with me on this trip. either way, she gave me a big ol' chunk of hash as a parting gift...not sure if it was for me to remember or forget her by; both options always comes so easy and natural for me. my trip is winding down to a close and i'm stoked to return. i had a big, grandiose plan to ride a motorcycle across india but learned that it'll be monsoon season at the time, so that ain't happening. i've had enough of blake in amsterdam and i'm ready to just throw her into keizersgracht, or fight her to the death in the middle of liezeplein but first make her feel gezzelig before i'm like "tot ziens!" and throw her in front of the lovers canal cruise like some bitterballs into the deep fryer and make her feel like she's just an object frozen in the walls of albert hein's imagination (and i don't mean parmaham). you know what i'm talking about, guys.

so, for those interested in how i'm going to be spending the rest of my time here, it's going to be:

- traveling throughout the rest of holland - the beach, the small villages, the modern architecture of rotterdam, the physical prowess of jean claude van damme
- eating at the best sandwich shop in amsterdam every day for lunch (they have over 40 types, the best sandwich shop i've ever come across) i think blake's been going there everyday for a month straight, but has made no progress..she can't off the italiano and i'm about to look at her as if she's princess toadstool.
- drinking small, jr. pints of beer. i think i'm going to buy a 20 pack of heineken (which tastes gross in the states, but yummy in the dam), wake up, drink it, and see where it takes me. i have yet to do one of those, "chill outside on a balcony and drink beers until the sun rises with just friends" type things yet
- bypass starting, finishing or continuing things with insignificant people i've met here and really just hang with my close friends and learn as much from them as i can before i utilize those tools to afford myself a bigger balcony.
- i haven't touched the petal of a tulip yet, so i'll go do that. preferably on the ink of a whore's tailbone.
- go to a hip hop, funk, soul joint (tonight hopefully)
- miss out on the catpower concert (damn you blake) if i went with blake i could just tout, "ha. she's lame, all tortured and stupid with her emotions" if i went by myself i'd just cry at how strikingly similar our emotional quotients are.
- eat more aged gouda, chips n peanut sauce, raw herring sandwiches
- drink every last bit of shitty coffee so that i won't come back permafag for loving tea so much more than coffee.
- smoke weed and spread the gospel of hip hop and indie rock.

my time here's finite and i've got a hershey's bar of hash to smoke. so with that, all i have to say is..."doooooooooooooooooode!!!!!"

peace ya'll,

-- sonnyred

TEMPORARILY OUT OF ORDER (but always out of line)

ha! can i get any darker? we'll see when i return and tear up the waves in the cool ocean water! but i really need to focus on my book (the main reason why i'm here). so i'm really not going to be able to post too much stuff...the internet connection where i'm at is rather garden snail so it's just not worth my time.

but alas, wait till i get back. i'mma go surf, buy a lappie, come back and post the hell out of my trip. i still need to include ireland...wait'll you see the pics...beautiful coastline, my friends posing leisurely in their underwear, crazy stuff.

and you know, as the time winds down, and the whiskey goes down, and my high goes down, and more shit goes down, my entries are only going to get gayer; it'll be so sappy you'd want to make honey out of me and spread me all over your genitals.

i'd tell you how i feel right now but fuck, the impending return is going to be bittersweet; i'd tell you how i feel right now but i need to assess everything.

all i know is that i've been gone for 4 months. we'll see how much/little i've changed, along with the world around me. all i know is that i've had more than enough of amsterdam, more than enough of not having closed walls for me to sleep in, and more than enough of los angeles. this trip has thoroughly reduced me to particle form; i'll think about it some more, throw my shit particles in the air, and see what sticks.

for now, i'm exasperated.

ALICIA AND ANOTHER GIRL - Life in Ukraine (as told to me by an American ex-pat)

I left this unedited, on purpose:

"So.. last friday... we are out to dinner at some restaurant and that girl that we met at Soundplanet calls me and tells me that she is "super bored" of her friends and wants to meet up.. so I tell her to meet us at dinner... from there we go to that club Barsky.. but my other friends could not get in... so now it's just Alicia and me... and while we are chill'n at the bar, drinking overpriced shots of vodka, I start rubbing her silk undies right above her snatch:) At this point we've been in Barsky for about 15 minutes... so, we both agree that this place is lame and decide to go back to my place to smoke kalyan/hookah = code for fuck:) Get back to my place.. start puffing the hookah pipe.. she drops the coals all over my rug, rug is ruined, nbd:)... I start licking her nips, she gets naked, we fuck, life is great!:) 18 year old, naked hard body on top of me! So it's about 1:30 at this time... we continue to puff the hookah, naked on my rug that has 3 huge burn marks in it (fortunately the coals all landed on the black part of my rug, so the damage doesn't look that bad)...about 20 minutes after round 1 and about 10 minutes before round 2 of "______ loves highschool":) I get a call from this girl that I met at shooters a week before... met her only that one time, chatted on the phone a couple times after that and had made plans to see eachother that weekend... but now it's Friday at 2am (sounds like a bootie call to me, no?)... She says that she is right next to my apartment and wants to know if I wanta go for a walk with her.. I actually tell her I'm kind of sleeping although the truth is that some 18 year old cutie is playing with my you know what.. She tells me not to be lame, so I tell her I can meet her in 10 minutes:) I tell Alicia (the girl I just shagged) that my new girlfriend just called and I need to meet her... she says "no worries, I've got a boyfriend as well... totally understand".. Before she leaves we agree that we need to have group sex with her equally cute friend sasha and I go out to meet this other girl.. So this other girl that I met at the club (only once) is super cute.. used to be a dancer.. about 22-23, perfect small body, blonde hair and a great smile! We walk for about a 100 yards, before she tells me that she would love to smoke some hookah, but doesn't know where we can do that at 2am? I tell her that I have a hookah ready to go, she agrees as long as we only smoke it in the kitchen and not the bedroom... of course... then she tells me that she needs to be at work at 7am and her work is next to my house, so would it be cool if she crashes on my couch... I tell her, she can sleep in my bed and I'll crash on the couch... so, we smoke, chat and then go to bed.. I tuck her into my bed, give her a little kiss and hug, which turns into me sleeping in the same bed... couple kisses, it's about 4am by this point, we go to bed, wake up at 6am cuz she needs to go to work.. she callls work to ask if she can be late, they say yes, I ask if she wants anything to eat, she she "yes, you":) that turns into a great 1 of fun without cloths that includes everything from 6 to 9 and then some:) Brotha, life could be worse:)"

CITY POWER RANKINGS - BRUSSELS

CITY POWER RANKINGS

BRUSSELS: 6/10

Liveability: 6/10
This city was so boring I didn't even want to write about it. Ok, the city is nice. The fries here aren't as good as the ones found in Amsterdam, but were a lot more expensive. Because the EU is headquartered here, you see a bunch of yuplomats riding around in fancy cars. The thing that really pissed me off is that there are so many hidden costs when you're out dining. Even the simple act of eating your sandwich at the deli will cost you extra money. However, I must say that Belgians got beer on lock down. So with the best beer in the entire galaxy and some cool people, I give them a 6. Still, I would never live here. Oh yeah, the rent isn't that cheap either.

Nightlife: 2/10
I'm sure I didn't go to the right areas, but I did go to a somewhat "cool" neighborhood -- all I found was a dive bar that played crappy music, and was only occupied by two guys that looked equally crappy. The other nights were spent at a house party and at a BBQ...with drunk 18 year olds....and I was the most drunk, and I wasn't even drunk. I mean, come on, you're 18! You should be getting shitfaced, throwing yourselves at members of the opposite sex and solve the world's problems while lying on the hoods of cars. Not sure what's going on, but these more affluent, Western European countries don't drink the way Americans do.

Culture: .1/10
I really don't have anything to say about Brussels. It's a nice country, but there's no underground scene and not really any cool street art. You see, street art is very important to a city -- it's a reflection of progression, political commentary, counter culture, and the voice of the upcoming generation. None of that was found in Brussels -- a melting pot of different cultures with no culture of its own. I mean, the EU is fucking based here, can we get some synergy? The city should be a mecca for international culture. Thank god that didn't happen to America.

People: 8.5/10
The people here are nice and normal and cool. I couchsurfed with two amazing Belgian women (a girl and her mother) and they were truly gems. I met a bunch of other cool Belgians also; subjectively speaking, their relaxed attitude and affinity for Americans definitely boosted it up. I like them and I'm sure I could have a bunch of fun with them. The people here in Amsterdam are just so normal, just so damn normal, so normal that with my loud voice and fluctuations, I must sound like James Brown every time I open my mouth to talk. Ok, I'd live here for a little bit, six months max.

PROS: The absolute best beer in the entire galaxy. Herbinger was mi favorito (that's Spanish for "the best beer in the galaxy"). The people are pretty nice.

CONS: Brussels is just like brusselsprouts, good for you, but boring as shit. Give me some, muthafucking, jalapeneno, and shit.

CITY POWER RANKINGS - DUBLIN, IRELAND

CITY POWER RANKINGS: DUBLIN, IRELAND

Liveability: 1/10
The capital city kind of blows. There is nothing exciting there, at all. The city looks nice and is well-kept. The sidewalks are wide and the climate is awesome (cold, wet climate) and green is everywhere. My dad emailed me with his excitement that I'll be going there, "The people there are very nice. Also, they have the Irish Sprint soap." Not sure how the latter holds true, but I can't make it anymore obvious how unimpressed I was with the city. Due to the economic success the country has experienced over the past few years, things are expensive! I'd say somewhere between Amsterdam and London. You cannot eat a good, healthy meal for less than $13 EUROS. You cannot get a healthy salad, anywhere. And the bad food tastes bad. I don't get it! I would never live here (but I'd live in Limerick).

And for such a drinking culture, I was very letdown...

Nightlife: 2/10
Dublin really only has one central area to go drinking at, Temple Bar. It's a mishmash of locals and tourists; and there are really about 10 pubs in that area that are on and popping. Things close down at 2:30AM on the weekends, and 11:30PM on the weekdays. The pints are expensive and the Jack Daniels is cheaper than the Jameson; i just don't get it. You can't drink on the streets, either; which baffles me how Ireland is known for a country of drinking, yet it is so heavily regulated. Religious reasons, right? Dublin is a strong, strong pub culture and it seems like there is nothing else to do but go to pubs. True pub culture, and very identical to same stuff you'd see at any Irish pub. People just get absolutely shit-faced, overweight women of all ages would walk down the areas in groups, scratch that, herds, with cheap plastic boas and dildos (no exaggeration) and start dancing all sexy to Top 40s songs (why'd I have to hear Jimmy Buffet, lord?). I mean, songs where Casey Kasem or Rick Dees are the only source. No real lounges, or dive bars, or anything. I asked a handful of Dublin youth for below the radar bars or certain underground gathering places and they couldn't name a place...

Culture: 2/10
I thought Dublin would have a big punk scene. I also saw posters for some pretty decent hip hop (Madlib, J Rocc) acts; so if there's a market for them here I'll give the city the benefit of the doubt. But other than that, there is no counter culture, no teenage rebellion. The university's art gallery was the equivalent of watching a dog go poop.

People: 5.5/10
The people of Ireland are their key asset. Just all good people; I'm not going to say any further. In my opinion, the Irish accent is the most charming (American too sloppy, English too stuck-up and boring, Aussie too nasal-y, Kiwi too indecipherable). I had to give this one a 6 because attractive women just aren't there. I'm sorry, but you go into a pub and the girls are like Frat Boys, but not just Frat Boys, the fat, Frat Boys that binge drinks and acts foolish because he has something to prove. Super down to earth and good people, but you know your mental only makes up half of you..and to prove that I'm picky and that personality does count more, I threw in that .5. Most of the the attractive women here are Polish (which happen to be very beautiful), what a slap in the face.

Just in general...(Killarney, Cork, Dingle, Limerick, Dublin)
PROS
Good people. Food in villages is really good. Beautiful scenery. U2's Joshua Tree album. The Ring of Kerry. Guinness.

CONS
Expensive. It'd be a constant, aggressive image if you're red-green colorblind. Big mountain mamas. Drinking there sucks. Nothing underground. Sinead O' Connor. The fish n chips here, suck!!!

MAY 2, 2008 - SHANNON AIRPORT, INNER DIALOGUE

NOTE: This is my third straight attempt at starting the entry and I'm just going to drill through it, no looking back. Funny, it's almost as if not writing this will somehow freeze time and stop the Earth in mid-rotation. I came to Ireland with no expectations, just anticipation. I was stoked and excited to see Mike, Cam and Patrick again. Somehow the vines of my thoughts wrapped around them in the short amount of time (2 weeks) I spent with them in Ukraine. And before I knew it, the vines became trunks, leaves, and branches; rooting themselves deep into me as we drove across the country -- giving me the elevated sense of awareness and regard that is only reserved for lifelong friends. Mindblowing.

Makes me think about life -- mine in relation to theirs and the human condition and its mechanisms. I sit here in an empty airport terminal and already I feel a bit saddened. They're off to see the cliffs of Mohur, soon they will be flying to Krakow, Poland only to take an 18 hour train ride (suckers) back to Ukraine. Pat will be back in the small quarters and shadow lit corridors of Lvov, Cam will be in Kiev doing something related to Hockey, or Law, or Luda. And Mike, he'll be sitting on that old antique Victorian couch in his high-ceilinged, Soviet apartment -- plotting out his next home cooked meal effort or throwing in my face all the beautiful, model looks and porn star built, Ukrainian women he'll be indulging in. We met these two girls at a discotech in Kiev on my first night there, (and I'll just say) he was the envy of the room when he was last with them, a few weeks ago. And he doesn't even care that I put it out there because towels are like wet naps when you're Mike Johnston.

Back to life for me, as well; fluid as the ocean. Mine will take me on a plane, and in about two hours, I'll be in Brussels, to be received by the generosity of two strangers (a cute young girl and her gracious mom). Tonight I'll be partying in Brussels with Pom and a bunch of young, drunk teenagers. Tomorrow, I will be stumbling along similar lines. Then I'll be heading back home -- which for now happens to be Amsterdam. Very excited. Very tired. Kinda stinky. Whatever, this makes me think of the human condition. Right now I'm totally bummed that we've reached the end of Ireland. After all, there are more hills to roll down, more fish to fry (of which I've had the worst and the best), and surely every pub in Ireland must have enough beer for at least one more round between us. But where will the next one take place? In Sweden, at Mike's family ranch? Purchased at twilight kiosks and consumed at 2:00AM in Kiev while waiting for the rest of Eastern Europe to catch up? Slurped off the naval of one of those girls we met? Really though, will I ever see them, any of them, again?

I'm not sure what's worse -- the fact that I'm going to miss them or the certainty that life goes on and the fact that I will press on, successfully and effortlessly without them. I'm sure, years from now, pints will be raised and once in a while the boys and the rolling hills of Ireland will come to mind. And everything will be all good, no big deal, no hard feelings of me missing them. It's amazing, the way the human condition prepares you to move on. It ensures our survival. It makes perfect sense. But this whole letting go thing; it never gets easier. It's something I don't think I'll ever understand.
(Hey, I happen to have a weak internet connection so I won't be posting up images till way later)

APRIL 25, 2008 - SHIT'S WILD, YO

Ok, the adventure has begun. So I'm on the train from Brussels to the airport to prepare for my flight to Dublin, Ireland. Sounds like a cinch right? Well my dumb ass didn't adequately prepare for it. Ok, to not sell myself short, my fun ass wanted to open myself to the world and to the spontaneity it as to offer. Besides, not that I completely believe in fate, I have had a few conversations with this amazing person, my own lame ass read The Celestine Prophecy so I'm all thinking about this energy, quanttum physical way of how the world works. Ok, long story short, when I was young I used to think that I could alter the physical world by mere thoughts alone. Not too inaccurate if you've been me for the past few days (ask me when I'm drunk).

But yeah, not as simple as going to the airport to catch my flight:
- I'm flying out of the other Brussels Airport, 60 km away
- Flight is at 6:30 AM (via Ryan Air)
- I tried booking a shuttle service to pick me up, I left my cell phone so that they can SMS me when they arrive. I was going to go to a party with my Couchsurfing host and then just go straight to the airport.
- I paid for the service, never received an email confirmation and there are no phone numbers listed on the website.
- I ran out of credit on my prepaid cell phone and they don't have T-Mobile in Belgium. I cannot refill my account through the web or by phone.
- I did some research online and read horrific reviews about the shuttle service -- instances where they would cancel at the last minute and the person would have to take a cab to the airport.
- The cab costs about $150 EUROS if you want to take it at 4:00AM.
- I could either wait outside on the streets from 1:00AM - 4:30AM for the shuttle to pick me up (that was the timeframe given to me).
- I could try to figure out how to get there. RIGHT FUCKING NOW and sleep at the airport.

Currently I'm on the train, trying to figure it out. I haven't even figured out Dublin yet, but that's a hibernating beast so I don't care.

All I can think is, "I hope I get both armrests."

LIFE LESSON - DEADLY COMBINATION

Life Lesson - Deadly Combination

"Though the pairing makes perfect sense, it would be ill-advised to eat cheese and drink milk at the same time."

Always learning.

Taught while sitting in Blake's living room. Eating some aged gouda over a glass of soymilk.